What does it mean to be a trustbuilder in a culture that only seems to value things in terms of dollars? What are the challenges that come when you set out to build trust, and what are the rewards? Mercy Okalowe attends a Trustbuilding workshop and finds out.
Recently I had the privilege of participating in a four-day workshop in Calgary, Alberta, to train as a Trustbuilding Facilitator with Cricket White, Director of Education of IofC USA. Though it was a four-day module, I spent eight days in Calgary staying in the home of Joy and Keith Newman, who work with Initiatives of Change there. My living arrangements alone spoke volumes about trustbuilding but we’ll get to that later.
First I want to share my personal reflection from the morning of the first day of the training:
May 3, 2011 @ 7:16am
This feels like a new beginning. In this moment I feel settled and grounded. I am sitting on the pull-out couch in the guest room of Joy and Keith Newman’s home in Calgary. How did I get here? It doesn’t really matter. What matters is that I’m here. I want to bring my true loving self to these trainings. Could I be a trustbuilder? Trust, like all other good things, must originate from within. I must have trust in my heart. I must trust myself. Above all, I must trust in the Spirit that has led me thus far. God, Creator, Divine Source, whatever we call it I am humbled in its presence…sincere thanks to God for all that I have, all that I am, and all that is yet to be.
I wanted to share this because it demonstrates just how deep the concept of trust can go. The day before the training began I found myself caught in a state of anxiety at the thought of taking trust so seriously that I would travel almost 3,000 km to learn more about it. My former business school colleagues would question my sanity! Indeed, I didn’t give them any specifics about why I was going to Calgary for a week…just work stuff I told them. Why did the idea of becoming trained to facilitate trustbuilding workshops fill me with such anxiety? And, perhaps more importantly, why did I feel I would be ridiculed by some of my friends for it?
It goes almost without saying that I am not immune to the influence of the culture in which I’ve been raised. It is a culture in which ‘value’ is largely determined by market forces. Whether it is the commodity market, the labour market, or the market of services, something is only of social value if its ‘exchange rate’ can be easily calculated.
So where does that put trust? Can we assign a value to it? What is it worth?
Thinking back to my financial accounting classes, the only time I could remember anything even close to the concept of trust being discussed was in relation to ‘goodwill’. Goodwill can be defined in numerous ways. According to a 2002 Revenue Canada document, goodwill can be defined as: ‘the whole advantage, whatever it may be, of the reputation and connection of the firm which may have been built up by years of honest work or gained by lavish expenditures of money.’
Replacing ‘the firm’ with ‘the individual’ I started to realize where some of my anxiety was coming from. By pursuing this training to be a trustbuilder, my reputation would be under scrutiny and – having no lavish pools of money to tap – I would have to do years of honest work!
At first this could seem like a daunting undertaking. But what was the potential return on this ‘investment’? What could I gain by maintaining a noble reputation, staying connected with others, and doing honest work? How would I define 'honest work'? And what in the world does a 'noble reputation' look like?
In my opinion, many of our social ills are rooted in a deficit of trust – whether that’s a deficit of trust in self, trust in others, or trust in the Spirit which guides us. For anyone who seeks to address these social ills, a deep examination of our own experiences as trustbuilders (or trust-destroyers) is crucial. The training delivered in Calgary taught us some excellent trustbuilding workshop techniques. Beyond this, space was created for each of us to go deeper into our own relationship with this relatively intangible – but no less important – concept called trust. (If you’re looking for some ‘virtual space’ in which to consider trust in more depth, Chris Breitenberg has been sharing some thought-provoking posts through his blog Trustbuilding Leadership.)
Upon my arrival in the home of Joy and Keith Newman, I was handed a set of keys to all the doors I could possibly need to unlock and I was invited to treat their home as though it was my own. Can you think of any better way to establish a basis of trust between host and guest? I wonder whether an increase of social trust would have any effect on rates of homelessness? Imagine if we trusted so thoroughly that every guest room and every empty bed could be filled by a body in need. Trust may not be so easily measured as rates of homelessness and financiers may never value it beyond the ambiguous term of 'goodwill'. But that surely won’t stop me from applying my newly acquired skills in facilitation of trustbuilding workshops. Maybe I’ll even invite a business friend or two to attend.
Mercy Okalowe completed formal training in the areas of Investor Relations and Organizational Behaviour. She currently resides in Toronto, Canada.
NOTE: Individuals of many cultures, nationalities, religions, and beliefs are actively involved with Initiatives of Change. These commentaries represent the views of the writer and not necessarily those of Initiatives of Change as a whole.
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