From her sister Helen Hayes:
Barbara and I were very close in our younger years – we had no option living in a small bedroom together, one wardrobe and a desk for study. We often wore identical clothes – only 13 months between us. It was a wonderful upbringing where we roamed the adjoining hills with the 5 neighbouring children, entering into the life of local church and school. Holidays were at the Pointon farm with Barbara learning new skills of cooking and sewing.
Barbara was an exceptional student. She also enjoyed sport, piano and craft work, something she pursued in later life. She was a high achiever at Unley High School, as head prefect.
In November 2019 Garfield I went on a holiday with Barbara on the Mornington Peninsula. Barbara insisted on doing the driving -- we were lucky to arrive there alive! A very happy two weeks and the last time we would see her.
Barbara was not a particularly effusive person, rather she was steadfast in her care for others and committed to her life’s calling. I am full of admiration for her courage in her illness and thankful for our friendship. What an inspiration and legacy she has left us for the coming years.
From one of her three brothers, Mike Brown, who donated a kidney to her:
Yes, I shared a kidney with Barbara. She shared something much more vital: her heart. My kidney gave her another 22 years of life. What she shared with me, and with many, was a purpose that made life worth living.
When I was about 10 years old, my sisters Helen and Barbara came back from a church youth camp full of the joy of having made a wholehearted commitment of their lives to God, and to follow the way of Jesus. As I entered turbulent years of being a teenager, I wanted the liberation I saw in them, and so made that commitment too.
Our commitment to faith has found expression through the fellowship and action of MRA or Initiatives of Change as it is now known.
It was Initiatives of Change that took Barbara to Papua New Guinea, India, England and many places. That was her framework for action. But her commitment – her purpose for living -- was bigger than a movement or an organisation.
I once described my sister as patron saint of Spirit-inspired, practical hands-on, problem solvers. While husband John was a prophet of nuanced truths and big picture philosophical frameworks, Barbara had a (mostly) endearing bluntness about her. She gave the truth as she saw it, untarnished. But it was never judgemental; it did not have sharp edges. She engaged with people to lift them, to help them find ways through what they were facing – with a bit of practical assistance thrown in where needed. More than love in action, she got into action with love. All was part of that huge sense of service that quietly (and efficiently) got on and did the job. She didn’t need to learn humility and care; she had it.
Always looking for a practical step forward, she’d come out to the breakfast table chewing over some problem, saying ‘I was thinking, what about such and such…’; and then, before the rest of us could weigh the nuances, she’d be giving it a try. She had that way of connecting a need with a practical next step, even if the whole picture wasn’t clear.
As one friend wrote recently: ‘She has never lived in a bubble but rather been a woman of the world - a world she has made more beautiful. I will always be grateful for all she has given to me and to so many.’
And that led to many adventures, a phenomenal range of friendships in all sorts of places and groups – from kindergarten committees, to Polish intellectuals, to Aboriginal community leaders, to refugee families in trouble, to name just a few. Her decades of service with MRA/IofC included long periods in the UK, India and Papua New Guinea, mostly with her husband, John. But Melbourne was their home initially at the MRA centre, Armagh, which she cared for tirelessly even after setting their own independent living.
It’s best to let Barbara speak for herself, to remind us just what her spirit was like. Here’s an audio sound bite captured from her 70th birthday party:
RECORDING: I just feel as if I’ve got so much to be grateful for. My life has been incredibly interesting… Some things I wish hadn’t been quite so adventurous.
The thing that I treasure most is that my parents gave us a faith that God would lead us no matter what the situation, no matter how good or how bad it looked.
We have had our ups and downs in life. At 52 I was so ill before I went onto dialysis and I thought that was it. Then thanks to God, and to Mike, and the kidney and I’ve had another 20 years. And I say, live life to the full and make the most of every day, go out and explore. Don’t stay stuck in one place.’
As I said goodbye to Barbara, on 23 December at the Royal Melbourne Hospital, I whispered in her ear the words of the prophet Isaiah: ‘Do not be afraid, I am with you. I have called you by your name, you are Mine.’ She whispered back: ‘Yes, I know Mike.’
Thank you for sharing your heart, Barbara.
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