From burn-out to inner light

Above: Eva Måsén Duckert's paining "Ljuset".

DEDICATED MY LIFE

In the ante-chambre  of the 1968 student revolution I gave my life to change the world. Yes, this was the wording and the concept! I was only 17 and I gave up my studies, even my schooling, my time and energy, above all my youth for this purpose!  My wholeheartedness allowed little space for seeing to my own personal needs. I wanted to be a Revolutionary for God before I knew how to be me. After some years I had a very severe and long-lasting Burn-out. An obvious result, now looking in retrospect! It was quite a blow!

BURN-OUT TO INNER LIGHT

A walk on a very long and often painful road started that should make a better equation of the sensitive person I am  and the inner and outer pressures of what I wanted to do with my life! The light inside me  which I always had been drawn to was transformed  from being a strain of following a torchlight to becoming a free source of my being. At this point, when not only all energy for altruistic action but also ideas and even words had run out and this totally impoverished shell of my being was all that seemed left, I started to paint.

LIVE AND PAINT FROM SAME SOURCE

I could only paint if I dropped all desire of result, left all control and just let go. It was just like I had to live. To live and to paint mutually depend on drawing from the same source. That of Life itself  which wants to love, to heal and become wholesome! To do, to achieve and to produce when it comes from wanting to be the Source itself comes from the Ego and inevitably runs me down. To draw from the Source out of love and even attraction enriches me and makes the journey light!.

HEAVY BRICKS INTO MOSAIC

The heavy bricks to carry  of what I thought was my task were lifted from me. The notions of personal change, listening to ones inner voice, finding God's plan for ones life and even for the world which I had been a militant messenger for were broken down into millions of unidentifiable stones in order for the mosaic of my life to be laid. This creation  is of course never finished! Recently, at the time of age when one usually retires a new adventure opened for me. It took me to  live in Sardinia where  I now permanently exhibit my paintings in a private Art gallery belonging to two local great artists. My life with them and with others here is just inseparable from my sense of calling as is my living and my painting!